February 2012
21 posts
Food Critic Puppy
animalsbeingdicks:
“At first, the sweet tanginess hits you like a culinary ‘MACK’ truck, while the subtle fruitiness makes itself apparent towards the end. Overall, it’s simply too one-note and derivative. I cannot recommend lime. ★★☆☆☆” - Dog, Bon Appetit Magazine
2 tags
Maybe you'd be kidnapped by pirates
ffkg84:
And they would take you to their hideout As pirates often do But I’d find the secret map And I would vigilante-bushwhack Through the jungles of Peru
Just to save you and I’d take you north to Mexico Where you would tell me your life story on the steps of a Mayan temple Where we’d camp singing nonsense songs in 12 bars to the jaguars,until you’d sense me Your eyes convincing,and I would...
Daily argument with my mother
Mom: You didn't finish the *insert whatever food is about to go bad*! You always waste food!
Me: You know you're capable of eating it too! Why am I always the one who gets blamed for not eating everything?
*eats whatever it is to end the argument*
Mom (as I'm finishing whatever food we're arguing about): You shouldn't eat so much, you're gaining too much weight!
Me: ...
Mom: You could really do with losing some pounds.
Me: ...
Mom: What? Now you're mad at me for being honest?! Grow up!
I wonder why I have no self esteem.
What I hate most about Twitter: finishing a good...
January 2012
53 posts
Saying ‘I notice you’re a nerd’ is like saying, ‘Hey, I notice that you’d rather...
– John Green (via theglasschild)
Box: To see how you can help lemurs look inside!
*opens box*
Me: Well, that was disappointing. I thought a lemur would pop out and thank me for freeing it!
Whenever I play a board game →
ffkg84:
aweyeah:
10knotes:
At first I’m like
But when I lose I go all
Your life is meaningless without following this blog!
…Kat knows how serious I am about board games. I regret nothing!
The only time I’m afraid of Ewa is when we play a board game together lol
Not true! You fear just standing next to me if I move too quickly too! Don’t deny it. You always flinch! FEAR...
Whenever I play a board game →
10knotes:
At first I’m like
But when I lose I go all
Your life is meaningless without following this blog!
…Kat knows how serious I am about board games. I regret nothing!
2 tags
minkusgavein:
I’m dying over here!
i am and always will be the optimist: can we talk... →
robin-sparkles:
and how all the kids that got on that show were fucking dumbasses
like seriously
the show came on every other fucking day
there are only three pieces of the silver monkey statue
THE PIECES ARE THE SAME EVERY TIME
AND YET
every time some little shit gets to the end…